La Crema Tapas & Chocolate
Light but intense and sexy-as-hell small plates in hoity-toity village (Rosemary) west of Panama City Beach. Very different experience and the 15-minute drive down 30A is the unfettered stuff of 1980s PCB.
Song that Pops in My Head When I Enter: Don’t Know Why (Norah Jones)
The Vibe.
Pretty people getting slowly inebriated on $100+ bottles of Cab at lunch and pretending to eat. Tucked away on the swanky European-looking street in Rosemary Beach amongst $3 million condos. Sitting outside in nice weather feels like you’re totally at a cafe on a movie set.
What a Woman Should Wear: Pretty and feminine resort wear with Bulgari sunglasses.
At The Table Next to Us: Outgoing, super-fit female anesthesiologist and her musician husband and two home-schooled children.
Looks Like an Occasion for: Day-drinking.
The Food.
Go small or go home.
There’s some larger-plate selections such as the pleasing paella, but the little plates and chocolate are what make this a real experience. Steak empanadas are crispy and provide light but hearty satisfaction, while the goat-cheese stuffed piquillo peppers and serrano-wrapped figs provide a delightful variety that is is rarely found after marriage (without remorse).
It’s okay to skip food together and just do the chocolate fondue or the warm and crazy-good chocolate-chip cookies with milk shooters.
Skip the good but ordinary crabcakes.
Don’t Miss: Something chocolate (it’s pretty much fantastic), daily hummus, serrano-wrapped figs.
The Service.
Professional and neat servers are prompt and generally knowledgeable but have an edge of I’m-too-sexy-for-my-job about them.
Expect to wait. As soon as you get to Rosemary Beach, go ahead and get your name on the list. Then spend your time browsing the Instagrammy stores until you are notified that your table is ready.
Level of Happiness
Five purrs.
We’ve never had a bad day or a bad memory at La Crema. For first-timers, it’s a true “Wow!” experience. It is possible to leave still hungry and with far less money, but in a kind of good, what-is-money-anyway kind of way.
Number of Cats Spotted: Only if maltipoos, goldendoodles, morkipoos, and labradoodles count.
Suggestion Box: Bring back the chocolate-covered bacon.
